oooh, you can hover over the header. big fricken deal.

03|29 Miriam Berated Me
Well, not exactly berated me, but let me know I needed to update here. I ran the LA Marathon earlier this month. You have no idea how much time that actually takes... and I'm not referring to the 5 hr. 4 min. it actually took me, but the 3-5 hours every Sat. and the hour 1/2 3 times a week. ALOT of training.... which leaves little time for asininity.

YET... I read something sufficiently asinine today. The North koreans stated "The DPRK will increase its self-defensive capability and fully demonstrate its might under the uplifted banner of the army-based policy”. Does anyone think that sounds a bit like the web economy bullshit generator? Someone set them up the generator.
09|21 Real Life Usurps Asininity
Ahh, the real world. Serious endeavours have taken up all of my time lately. BP Design has really taken off, as well as my SEO company. Launching 1st Botox soon as well. Establishing a sales structure for that is alot of work. That, and long days of talking tech/UI/design/SEO with clients leaves little time to update here.

Cori has of course taken up much of my time as well. It's funny how women do that. :)

Also, training for the LA marathon in March (ran 12 miles the other day... whew!), and mountain biking about 4 times a week. This is a good thing, as at the end of Tallan I was at 265 lbs. (prob what killed my ACL) but now I'm back to 225 lbs. There's just something about morale meals that puts on the weight! I hear Frenchy has been training for a marathon as well... gg frenchman... maybe you can make it to LA?
01|14 End of an Era
This weekend I helped move HB & Smalls (as everyone is calling him these days it seems) into the new pad. It's sad to see the Opal house go...if its walls could only talk... it would open its own website and sell memberships. With Will, Tip & Diana on the wrong side of the country, Steve married & cranking out Stevelings, & Opal no more, I think we have to close this chapter... but it's hard to let go.
Also, Happy New Year everyone. I'd make a new resolution, but I'm still keeping faithful to one I made a long time ago about stopping that nonsense.
12|19 Celebrating.
The one month aniversary of not updating this site. woo hoo. This was pointed out to me by Dan today. Be sure to check out his south park christmas spoof in the interactive zone too. Very cool, and I play Cartman. That's where he complained about updates...OK, I get the picture.
Also, You want something interesting... well, had a blast down at Balboa Island with the boys this weekend. Made contact with Bus41 for a Glamis trip soon. Have to hit the river with Johnny's boat when it gets warmer too. Incriminating cruise pictures are up at, John's site. I deny all knowledge of any of the activites in which I may or may not have partook. Is that a word? :)
Also, dumped the Tallan icons. It's been long enough, and I don't know if I'm still linked on the intranet I move farther away from that phase of my life it only seems appropriate.
11|19 Recooperating.
If I thought my knee wasn't rehabbed before I do now. Dancing for 5 hours straight every night on the ship...eating constantly...drinking up a storm...and now when I want to recooperate tonight....U2 at Staples center. Might see the crew of people on Bus 41 again...once we started getting loud we had a blast. Much bigger blast than the water shooting up through "La Bufadora"....a little spout of water Ensenada sucks tourists in to go see after walking through a gauntlet of shops who all have a "special deal for you only today my friend".
11|08 Lucky For Me
Something interesting enough for a post has come up, which saves me Casella's inevitable "it's been like over a month since you posted" comment. Just under a month Mikey.
There's a new asinine bet. A member of the Kinko's team has bet he can eat 11 whoppers! I'm 250 lbs. and i probably couldn't eat 4. The bet is up to $300 bucks, which suprised me. A year ago this would have been a grand easy, but me and Craig decided that must be the economy deflation acting itself out.
Also, I'll be hitting the ocean on a cruise to Mexico next weekend. You don't care, but I do.
10|11 Bert Stalks Usama
New hope for the war on terrorism...they are really stupid. Collecting images from the internet, manufacturers of Bin Laden posters inadvertantly allowed for a very very angry image of Sesame Street's Bert to make its way into posters they printed. A creative photoshopper no doubt added Bert in there. You can see Bert here, here in a protest, and here as well. Now thats funny. If bert only had a knife...
News Archive: For old news click here.

Cup of noodles Bet:
Phong called out Matt for a Cup of Noodles Bet. All cup of noodles brand noodles, 24/7, last man standing wins. Matt raised the stakes, cutting out smoking amongst other things. Phong agreed immediately. Matt backed off.
Kidney Bet:
Duke said that he'd only give his kidney to a "really hot chick". Joe bet Duke that he could find a girl that needed a kidney that was also "really hot". The bet was on. Duke quickly backed out. Duke likes his kidney.
Bahador NOT in the weight bet:
Bahador was kept out of the weight bet because of certain scale location problems. All people in the bet have categorically denied this had anything to do with the probability of the CSG whipping their butts.
The forever secret bet:
Certain person A bet that certain person B couldn't well, do something 35 times. Person B bet he could do it 144 times. That's about all I can say, laws the way they are and all. (p.s. some people have commented this sounds bad. it's not bad the way you sicko's are insinuating.)


Just watch them.

Synchronized Slammin (utah)
Artificial Butter (knicks)
Coppertone (spurs)
Fresh Like Dante (lakers)


95' Mitsubishi 3000GT Spyder
Hard Top Convertible

More Buddy Icons!
Just Click the Buddy Icon to have it automatically set as your personal AOL instant messenger icon!

At Todd's birthday bash at The Grill, Poor Steve Gandee took a i will never move. noone cares.picture of Duke, unknowingly incurring a huge $44,000 dollar vanity fee. (thus the reason duke is blurred out on most of the site). We are currently trying to raise the money needed. To help out with the cost, send donations or fundraising ideas to:

01-03 Update: Checked the donation email link. Nothing seems to be wrong. Can't account for the lack of email's coming in. Hmm.

Gratuitous use of a killer gel graphic. BUT, when I made it,
I just knew it had to go somewhere.
no pointo in el hovering...comprende?

seriously, this doesn't go anywhere.
gratuitous glass button #2.
glass buttons rock.

Hall of Fame
Bets that topped them all.

Paintball Jungle 12 | 10 | 00  
Pimp n' Ho 10 | 31 | 00
Heavenly/Tahoe 12 | 15 | 00
Vegas 01 | 01| 01
Tallán@Lynn Rolloff
Paintball Jungle 02 | 04 | 00
Joe's '4 days' Weight Bet Essay
All Your Base Are Belong To Us
Civil Disobedience@SF Chinese NY
Race Across the Golden Gate Bet
Asinine Surgery

The Ted danson bet?!
The Ted Danson Bet. Why? I have no idea.
Saltine/Cheez-it Bet!
8 Saltine Crackers in 1 minute, no water. It's harder than you'd think, but less chance of throwing up. (See "milk bet" for that.)
Update from Duke: The saltine bet was tried on the bus - they lowered it to 6 for Matt's friend, but he gave up and paid 5 seconds after first stuffing 3 of them into his mouth at once. The bet was for the 20 bucks that he won from Dan after I failed to finish off half a box of cheez-its in 3 minutes.
Ski/Snowboard Bet!
  1. $100.00 Steve vs. Shawn: Snowboarder vs. Skier. Steve can purportedly pull 360's on the half pipe & Shawn has skied since birth. First one to the bottom of the hill wins.
Side bets: $100 Bill (Shawn) vs. Matt (Steve) to win & $50 Joe (Shawn) vs. Dan (Steve).
Update: Steve, Dan, & Matt lost. Shawn, Bill, & Joe won. Apparently it was a pretty close race down the Olympic downhill slope. The turning point, as Steve say's, was a flat spot where Shawn could tuck and Steve was out of luck. When I asked Shawn how close it was, he said he couldn't tell, it's dangerous to look back when your going that fast.
Milk Bet!
Todd took the gallon of milk in 1 hour bet. After 45 min's he had finished 3/4th's of a gallon. He spent that end time feeling sick & trying to throw up the milk he had already drank.
Milk Bet #2!
Mike Kabella took the bet and finished in about 15 minutes destroying Todd's 45 minute, 3/4ths of a gallon feat. Mike threw up about 2 minutes later.
Rolling bet!
A boatload of somersaults from the guy who did em. One of the best stories we've had to date. Read the full story here. This bet will soon be moved to the hall of fame.
NO Soda/NO chocolate bet!
This $300 bet with Joe (no soda) vs. Deb (no chocolate) has commenced, starting a good time ago. I'll get the date, Joe seems to be a wall of stone, while Deborah is struggling with the cravings for chocolate.
Update: 3-5: The $300 no soda vs. no chocolate bet ended last weekend when Joe forgot about the bet and had some gatorade, a drink he doesn't even really like. It doesn't amount so much to caving into the strains of the bet as much as forgeting about the eternal bet, but cheers to Deb anyway.
NO Smoking bet!
How long can Matt and Dan stop smoking. I've decided not to bet against someone, but rather offer a case of Corona every month they withstand this one. I suggest we all donate something every month, and call it a reason to party. Call it the 'Matt and Dan Haven't Kicked It Yet Party'.
Update: Dan lost. Another excuse: his best friend asked for him to smoke as a wedding gift. MHHMM...sure Dan. Then why ya still smoking?

This site is always a work in progress. It is best viewed from my monitor, on my computer, over a beer and a 17 hour work day.
Send me an AOL IM here or email me. "you'll feel better about yourself." (quote from